If you’ve ever called your significant other at the office to tell him that he had to rush home and skip poker night with his buddies because you had a temperature spike, or if you’ve rushed into the living room, frantically waving a positive ovulation predictor strip in the air then you can relate. You’ve gotten the act of baby dancing down to a science. Foreplay is non-existent and your bedroom moves are purely mechanical. You’re trying to achieve a goal and sex is simply the means to an end.

Face it: You’re in a sexual rut and you feel like there is nothing you can do to get out of it. You’ve become a slave to your cycle and your sex life has suffered as a consequence. The Big O now refers to that tiny window each month when your fertility monitor tells you to get busy. But, the good news is that it doesn’t have to be this way! There are plenty of ways to put the emphasis back on you and your partner.

The first step in the right direction is acknowledging that trying to conceive is a stressful time for both of you. You are agonizing over every drop of cervical mucus, the tiny pimple on your chin, and the slightest twinge in your abdomen. When you finally think you might be ovulating it’s only natural that you want to get in the bedroom as fast as you can. Especially in cases where you’ve been trying to get pregnant for a few cycles or more, this sense of urgency becomes even more apparent. But, for the man, sex on command is not only not sexy, but it can pile on an enormous amount of pressure to perform. In some instances, this anxiety may make your sweetie apprehensive about sex and completely turn him off.

Now, we’re not saying that you should cool off and take a break from baby dancing. After all, Immaculate Conception has only worked for one woman in history. But, we are suggesting that you implement some ideas to make sex more spontaneous, intimate, and fun! Think back to what you and your partner used to enjoy before you got caught up in all the baby business and you’ll be back to enjoying each other in no time.

Our top tips for putting the spark back in your sex life are listed below. Try our ideas or come up with your own! You’ll be surprised by how a little bit of effort goes a very long way.

Bring Romance Back into the Bedroom:

-Dim the lights and rely on candles for a soft glow

-Pop open a bottle of bubbly (non-alcoholic sparkling juices are a nice alternative if you’re cutting alcohol out of your diet)

-Have some chocolate-covered strawberries on hand for a sensual snack (the berries pack an added bonus of vitamin C)

-Scatter rose petals over your bed for a beautiful effect and a sweet smell

-Turn up the music of your choice to set the mood (Frank Sinatra, Barry White, Usher- it all works!)

Spice Things Up:

-Model your sexiest lingerie to quicken your man’s pulse

-Get some scented massage oil and give each other a racy rubdown

-Watch an adult movie together

-Slip into costumes and try some role playing for an adventurous and fun change

-Try some new positions for an exciting twist on your regular routine (switch to missionary, rear-entry, or side-by-side when you are close to the finish line to ensure that the sperm gets deposited closest to your cervix)

Try a Change of Scenery:

-Take a vacation to escape the stress of your everyday schedules and concentrate on each other (a long weekend at a B&B or a week in Tahiti would do wonders!)

-Scout out new locations in your home for a whole new experience (if you always wind up in the bedroom, why not spread some blankets out in front of your fireplace for a change? Hey, the kitchen table has even been known to do the trick!)

Instead of going through the process of trying to conceive with your mind fixed solely on the prize, stop and take the time to enjoy the journey. You’ll feel more satisfied, relaxed, and connected to your partner than ever before. And who knows? You might even get pregnant.

© FertilitySpot.com 2006